So all the guys just fade away. You complain that the single men near you don’t really want to have relationships. The fix, Before a date, close your eyes and imagine that the person you’re about to date is a dear old friend who you haven’t seen in years. Greet the guy and start the evening with that friendly vibe. If you like him, end the date with the same dating service profiles, You’re involved with a guy who may be married who sees you occasionally and only when it works in his schedule. For the most part, he treats you well when he’s with you. If he’s wealthy, he may buy you Manolos If he’s wealthy, he may buy you Manolos or take you out to five-star restaurants. He may be hot in bed. But he cuts you off if his wife or woman needs the slightest thing. And he’s never available when you need or want him. This rejection causes you a great deal of pain, yet you think that overall it’s a good deal. You spend a lot of time thinking and fantasizing about him, how he’s going to leave his wife or cut back on his work schedule and be with you in a rose-covered cottage or on the beach in Maui. In your heart of hearts, you know that day will never come, but you’re afraid to act on that knowledge. Although you’d never admit it, even to your best friend, you believe that this second-class status is the very best you’ll ever be able to get and you’re damn lucky to have it. The fix, Give up the crumbs and take a seat at the banquet table. First, break up with him. Then make a rule, I only date men who are a available and b crazy about me for real. Try this on for size, even if it means spending time with guys who aren’t good enough but who treat you like royalty. You need to learn what it really means to be loved. If you recognize yourself in any of these scenarios, congratulations. You have the courage to really date yourself, and that’s always the first step towards change. The second step is to try the fixes on for size. If changing your dating service profiles feels weird, remember, that strange scary feeling means you’re on the right path to opening love’s door. If you spend a lot of time wondering if you’ll ever find that special relationship, stop. Instead, think about the millions of married women who wake up each day wishing they had made a different choice. Difficult as it may be, your longing beats their regret, especially if you use your time alone productively. According to a recent survey, nearly 15 percent of Americans say their biggest regret in life involves a love relationship biggest regret in life involves a love relationship. Of those, more than half say they would choose a different mate or dump a former love sooner if they could change their past.
